Well, I wrote on this for about 30min...and then my connection was lost.  And my "cut" of the selection has decided to not show up so I will sum up what I wrote (yes, less witty humor, but less reading for you, you putz)

1) New website this May/June.  No more Xanga basically. I will post the website on this site.  It'll basically have my art, video game fanart, flash projects, some video game information/reviews, and a lot of good times.  Look for it this May/June since you care.

2) Then in about 9 different paragraphs I talked about myself and how cool I am so I leave you with this:

The Legend of Zelda is coming out (hopefully) this holiday season. The new trailer is out and kicked my ass. That's all I can think of.  Man, what the hell did I write for 30minutes?

Oh yah, if I don't go to video game grad school, I'm going to Japan and marrying a video game tycoon.

Well, Xanga, goodnight and farewell.  Once again, this would have been a better entry had dialup not kicked me off and I had the desire to recollect everything I wrote and rewrite it.

Currently Reading All the King's Men (Harvest Book) By Robert Penn Warren see related

<<I think that girl is my twin. The resemblance is uncanny.

Currently Reading should actually say "Read Cliffnotes of this book Senior year for AP English"

I made the former entry (and now mysteriously absent) private because at the time I needed to share my experience.  Not with anyone to be addressed in particular, it was therapy for myself to release the anger and sadness and I no longer wish to speak of it.

I have been sketching a lot more lately.  I wish I could learn how to use paintshop.  I like the way artists bring their creations to life with the coloring effects.  I'm lazy, though.  I want to draw a picture like the bg of this site.  The background is Sephiroth from FFVII, which I'm playing for, believe it or not, the second time.  It's my second favorite game behind Ocarina of Time.

I have been working out more.  Trying to get back into the strong and proud body I used to have.  I used to have almost no body fat, and I could out-do anyone in a pushup contest.  I haven't gained any weight or anything, I just lost all my muscles and it has been replaced with softness.  I'll be soft when I have kids.  Until then (assuming that even happens), I want to be in incredible shape.  I want to be able to do flips, high kicks, dodges and other cool stuff.  I could say that I want to do this in order to impress others, but on the other hand, I want to do it for myself because I know I can.  And yes, I'm aware of the fact that instead of typing about working out, I could be working out, but it's 2:30am and I'm going to bed in a couple of hours.

I need to start learning Japanese again.  I learned all the pronunciations and some simple words, but damn, after I learn how to speak the language (at this rate, in about 10 years), I then have to learn how to read and write it, which is basically learning hundreds of symbols ( which = 40 years at the rate I'm going).  Fuukme.

The one thing I hate about home: dial-up losing connection about 6x in one hour.  Fuukyu

One thing I love about home: I wake up at 2pm, watch tv, play video games, have dinner, watch tv, play video games, sketch while watching tv, work out while watching tv, play video games and then I occasionally go out to see select friends, then I usually play video games and go to bed around 4am to prepare for it all to start all over in 10 hours.

If my life gets any more eventful, I swear I may implode.

A drawing of Link and Zelda from A Link to the Past I gave to my mother framed for Christmas. It is an interpretation of the scene where Zelda sends a telepathic plea across the world and Link is the only one to hear her call. Done in pencil, then traced with ink and colored with colored pencils.

This is an old picture of Marin from Link's Awakening I did over the summer.  I gave this to my grandparents framed for Christmas.  Done in pencil, ink and colored pencils.

I slept for 10 hours last night.  I had this dream that I was in a video game again.  Myself and a few of my friends were being kept in this dungeon by the "bad guys".  I don't remember what they looked like.  We were the chosen ones to save the world and nothing could be saved if we were cooped up in this dungeon.  Everytime we tried to escape, they would capture us and throw us back in, not before beating us up, though.  This happened a few times, and our group concluded that the only way we could save the world was for me to escape and come back after I had collected enough power to release them.  I managed to escape in a ninja-like manner and ran from my friends in hopes of gaining the ability to save them. 

But instead, I hopped in a limo with my friend Paris Hilton and cruised around Orland Park.  Man, that is not how I wanted the dream to end!  I wanted to save the world!  Not to hang out with a friggin dumbass!  I am disappointed with my imagination right now.

Well, I'm doing well in school.  I have a final on monday, a court date on tuesday, and a final on wednesday.  But nothing until then, I wish I could go home, but I have to work..joy.

I've been thinking lately, could a heaven truly exist?  I do believe that there is a God or something that created everything.  Because something cannot be created from nothing.  But, there are so many beings on this earth and other places we don't know of, how can there be a place where we all exist after life ends.  Maybe, its this place in your mind that you go to.  A place of eternal calm where you simply exist.  You are in a state of freedom and can construct a utopia for yourself.

I get scared when I think of death.  No one has ever lived to tell what happens when you die (duh) so no one knows what happens.  My biggest fear is that nothing will happen.  How is it that 19 years ago I didn't exist, and now I can't imagine not being alive.  Maybe when you die you return to what you were before you were born...nothing.  How tragic life would truly be.

I need to keep faith in the little hope I have that a greater meaning exists beyond the limitations of this world.  If a human can believe in something as profound as a heaven or an afterlife, surely a purpose for this thinking exists.

Sometimes I think I'm the only person who thinks like this.

The questions we will never see answers to until we experience it alone in the darkness.  How ominous.